Sunday, September 14, 2014

If I Could Turn Back Time

If I could turn back time, would I? And if so, how far? Would I go back to before the cancer, to save my beloved? Hell yes I would. But what would my life path be then? I know that he and I agreed to this long before incarnating in the physical, so I would be altering both our paths, changing the lessons needing learned. In so many ways, that would be selfish of me. Though I would still do it without hesitation. But imagine that I could, still, but only these last 2 years. Would I then? Maybe. Again, lessons needing learned on this particular path I have chosen to travel. My companions and I have also agreed to this. My question is, is there a happy ending? Do I find my prince? My second soul mate. Do I become someone's everything? Certainly I would love to go back and relive the last 2 months again. Some of the best days of my life. And I would not change much. I would savor the moments, commit them all to my memory banks, cemented even more so than before. Perhaps try to alter a few details. Maybe that would have made the outcome a little better for us all. To relive over and over the wonderful night of the Blue Ash concert. To revisit the Brew Ha Ha and the walk across the bridge, the wonderful dinner, and then the next week the adventure to Bobby Mackey's and the mechanical bull, the second walk across the bridge, the lock, locking hearts on the fence above the water. How much fun. I must have faith that there will be many many more moments like these, and even better ones to come. Friends made and then lost, regained again. Romances rekindled. Concerts and festivals and Kings Island all relived. Dancing, the margarita incident with Bonnie and Dave, bon fires. What a wonderful summer. And all in the last 2 months. So yes, yes I would turn back that time, if only to reexamine and enjoy those moments again, to glean that smallest bit more of experience from them. If I could change them, make them better, then so be it. A second chance. But you know, maybe the second chance will come, even without altering time and space.

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