Got to have fun with this post, as it has been way too emotional of a night, and I need to blow off some steam. To be honest, there is a lot of steam to be blown off that I will have to reserve for another venue. After this post, I may just go for a long walk in the dark under the stars. If I could, I would toss a bridle on Buck and hop on and tempt fate.
First of all, I don't like how I felt tonight. Pulled back and tense. Something needs to be said, something needs to come out of my head and heart, I just don't know what. And maybe that is because I am trying to express a feeling or emotion or thought that is just not ready to manifest yet. Yes,that is it! As I write this, it resonates with me. I was so full of this confusion and mental fog, that I could not be fully present tonight. And now that these words are out, I feel better. Another quick thought that needs to be expressed. I cannot bear to be let down, betrayed, patronized. Be honest with me, don't screw with me. Wow, where did that come from?
There are two awesome Brads in my life. One Brad is also known as "The BMK". He is fun and funny ( you FB stalker you ) and I have begun to see a kind and caring side of him concerning some questions I have had about my life. It is great to get a man's point of view about certain things, and in his ultimate coolness, he truly rocks! Thank you for looking out for me. I appreciate your advice and support, and I hope you are right, but, even though I should remain positive, I don't have that much confidence.But you guys really made me laugh about it the last couple of days. It has been so much fun and I really would like those good feelings to keep coming. Actually looking forward to the future and having fun with it. Do you know how much that means to me? Shit, I am awesome, and I can do anything I set my mind to. And now I find myself needing a man's advice. Ha, ha, ha. Silly girl. Seriously BMK, I could not have asked for a better place to work and people to work for and with. You are the awesome one! Thank you thank you thank you for bringing fun and excitement back into my days. And we will have to keep Candice from taking her pregnant self and kicking butt :) Or, maybe, she won't have to after all. But I will need your advice for that.
The next awesome Brad is my guru , who shall, for the sake of this post, be know as "The Grissom". Now what can I say about him? Well, he has made a world of difference in my life. I still don't know what to title him as formally. Therapist, life coach, friend. I have so many wonderful things to say
about this guy. I have never known another person ( aside from Chip ) as wise, kind, loving, caring, compassionate. He has reached out to me and welcomed me into his world and his radio community at Inner Guide Empowerment. Thinking back the last 6 months, it is inconceivable to imagine where I would be had we not met. Brad has shared every moment of my growth and awakening. He has encouraged me, supported me, pushed me to grow and thrive. Though I was already experiencing this wonderful new connection to Spirit before we started working together, I did not understand it or how to foster it. With Brad, I am learning skills, techniques, and tools to utilize on my journey. Oh, and there is so much more to learn. I hope that you will continue to be my guide, as I know that this adventure is just going to get better and more exciting as we go. Truly, where would I be right now? I would not have taken the steps that I have, had the courage to push past my comfort zone, had faith in the universe and allowed myself to partake in all of it's wonders and blessings. You encouraged me to go for that job, which has opened up a whole new world for me. And your helping me to connect with Spirit and to deepen that connection with Chip means the world to me. I truly believe that we were meant to cross paths. Yes, Chip is paving the way. And I am forever grateful for the blessing of you, my friend. I hope you do not mind if I consider you a soul friend.
And I have to find someone to help with the hay. Aughhhhhhh. I hope you are right about that one too, and Chip has got Dave in the works.
So there you have it. The two Brads. Two awesome people that I have the honor of knowing and calling friend.
And it is very late now and I really need to get to bed as I have to go to work tomorrow and actually work, BMK, and also the slave driver Grissom has given me much homework to complete.
Thank you to you both, and all of my beloved friends who love, support and walk with me on this journey.