Monday, May 27, 2013


Love it when you get an inspiration and you have to get it out in writing. So much I want to express, but the words just aren't quite right at the moment, or more precisely, the time is not right for the words. The more I think about certain things, the more convinced I am that they are, in fact, possible. And that gives me hope. Had a conversation tonight that helped put some things in perspective for me. ( Huh! Wasn't that a theme a couple of days ago?) Remember when I said that I don't understand when people come up to me and say that I am so strong, with all that I have gone through, when I feel like I am falling apart into a million pieces? Well, maybe I am strong. When you look at it. No wonder I am so freaking awesome! Something I never questioned was my ability to hold it together while Chip was sick. I needed to be strong for him, to show faith and hope.I really never gave myself permission to fall apart then because he needed me. He was ALWAYS there for me, always. That was the least I could do for him. Why am I mentioning this right now? Because I was inspired to. Someone is whispering in my head, telling me this is what to type. And I love it. And funny, but today I journaled something about this as well. And I am very grateful to have an outlet to get these feelings freed. So I may not have been as dedicated to my homework as I should be and have been in the past with past assignments, but I have been doing a lot of other creative work, so that has to count for something, right? But the time is right now to get down to the tough stuff and work on that nasty little wound of mine. I am not going to go into it but from some peoples perspective, my life could be considered pretty tragic. But it is not what happens to you, it is what you do with it, what you learn from it, what you take away from the experience. And if you allow it to strengthen you, make you a better, kinder, more compassionate and loving person, then you have won. I just realized that there is a statement in that letter that my mom and sister wrote that haunts me still. I will need to get that cleared. I know that I am rambling, but this is just coming to me as I type. One of those times. It may not make much sense.  Thank you my friend for the great insights tonight. There are a couple of things that I would love to accomplish, and I think that they are possible. Patience. My heart is true. And you are correct, I would not have believed 6 months ago that my life would be as it is now. And things are just going to keep getting better. For all of us.

Much Love!

No comments:

Post a Comment